Executive Speech Writing: Corporate, Celebrity, Fundraisers

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

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Taste of Chicago, Coffee, Starbucks Cards, Paris Hilton

The Taste of Chicago is coming June 29-July 8, 2007. Newspaper sales become a strange thing as tourists, and people from the suburbs who do not normally come into the Loop fall into overpriced chow lines.

Sometimes, I sell three times what I might expect. People who want to look trendy-city will pick up the Sun-Times as if they read it daily. I'll take their foolish money. Other people present that they are business-sophisticates, and buy a New York Times, Wall Street Journal or Financial Times. Mostly young people, and almost always with dates. I get more tips than when my regulars come by.

Speaking of tips. Made my day. Normally, I hate gift cards. I think they are the lazy man's Christmas or birthday gift. It is just cash in card form. However, a guy, one who stops occasionally gave me a gift card to Starbucks. It was worth $20.00.

Why? He received one as a gift, an office party thing, but hates coffee. When he passes each day, he always asks, "Hawk, how's the coffee today?" His way of making conversation, and so I tell him. When he buys a paper, we chat a little. I don't know him, but I don't not know him. There's that kind of relationship that happens when you see people daily, but never really get to talk.

There's a $20.00 card now, actually, closer to $15.00, after two cups of joe, extra cream, to get me going these last two days.

I regret to say I don't know his name. I'll ask.

The News
In the non-news category is that US Weekly has decided that they will not publish stories or pictures of Paris Hilton. Miss Hilton is not the ordinary salary girl. The salary girls want to be her: rich, stupid, beautiful and somehow important. We all want to matter in this life, even Miss Hilton, and every bimbo-headed salary floozy that walks by me with lattes each morning. US Weekly has decided that their readers are tired of Miss Hilton. It is a business decision, not an integrity-based one.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Humidity & The Tale of Two Asses

The humidity today was an invisible fog.

The News
The one is in the US World & News Report: The high school student who smugly held a banner at a school event that said "Bong hits 4 Jesus" was right to suspended, or at least, it was within the rights of his school to do so. I think the kid is an ass, and was not trying to make a statement. Nothing about his case compels me to think he is nothing but a boy without any real friends, looking to pretend he is a thinker.

Also, Tank Johnson lost his job playing for the Chicago Bears after being stupid, driving drunk or high. I don't know what they story is. Got frustrated, stopped reading. Too bad. He seems like a nice guy. Instead, like the high school kid, he's just an ass.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Movies, Mobs, Sosa

I'm a movie buff. Not really. I like movies, and have seen a lot of old movies recently. Black and whites, like The Thin Man with William Powell and Myrna Loy.

The Top Movies of All Time list has been released, so I have been thinking about the great ones I have seen.

Casablanca might top my list.

Rain's a-coming, and it is going to be hard. My plastic is ready, but if it is windy, there sinks my sales.

Ever buy a paper from a guy like me? If it is near 6:00, offer me half the price, and I might take it. Then, tip me a quarter. You'll get a nod and a thanks. I might even make sure you get a dry copy.

The News
Loser boys are on trial. (Post here and here). The Chicago flavored mob has been kissing themselves at trial all week, and, although most of them are old and useless now, they are said to be have been even more useless when they were younger. The closest thing to the "Sopranos" they might have is the the tune they'll be singing in the pen.

Wondering what they family secrets are that is being chatted about in the Chicago Tribune. Maybe one of these chumps will come out of the closet -- with his brother. No good, not one of them.

Sammy "No, I'm not on 'roids" Sosa hit homer #600 against the Cubbies. Maybe now he'll retire, turn off his music, and start his new career signing baseball cards for middle-aged men trying to remember when. At least Pete Rose hit every hit on his own power. It looks like he gambled (his own admission) but no one is thinking he was less of an athlete because of it.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Salary Girls, Chicago Mobs (& Other Street Thugs), Clinton Soprano Video

The heat has continued to bring out the salary girls at lunch, swaying short skirts and men's integrity for weeks now. Thong shoes, short shorts, you know the sort.

At a few corners, the bands are out. The AON Building has one, and there's one on Washington and, is it Adams? Usually pop blues. Works for me as the sound wafts through the corners and streets. Better than the bongo boys who play only one tune badly, and that guy with a saxophone. Nice try, pal, but even Bill Clinton plays better.

Have you seen the Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton, Soprano spoof/parody?. Looks like the Clintons, desperate to reach into Bil's popularity, prefer to associate themselves with the mob.

The News
Stan Lee got his own action figure. Not a doll. Action figure. (Comic-book legend Stan Lee gets his own action figure)

Speaking of mobs, and playing with things, the jury looks like it was chosen for the mob trial I told you about yesterday. What the mob boys will play with once they get sent up the river isn't mine to say. Street punks, with the class of thugs like the Vice Lords, Latin Kings and other charm school flunkies.

No one has ever said, "My, what a great impact the mafia has had on society." Instead, words like blight, crime, casinos, tobacco and other garbage are the terms of endearment.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Chicago's Mob on Trial, Thunderstorms and Conrad Black (barely)

Rain, rain, go away. Ain't nothing worse to a newspaper hawk than thunderstorms. Rain is one thing, but throwing a little lightening into the mix and I become person non grata.

That was yesterday. I think I sold two papers in the afternoon. I can't blame them, and I won't blame God, but if He wanted, He could've sent the rain in the middle of the night when I was sleeping. He didn't.

Today is nice. Damp, humid, but, so far, cool, but getting hotter.

The sight of a storm over Lake Michigan still thrills me. It is the closest thing we have to an ocean, and there is a kind of drama that doesn't happen on the streets all canopied by buildings and L-tracks.

The News
Conrad "The Dirty Rotten Bum" Black's trial looks like it is coming to a close. That's my nickname for him. If the guys in the mob get a nickname, he certainly deserves one too.

Equal to him among human vermin is Joseph "Joey the Clown" Lombardo. Why do they call him a clown? Big nose? Does he dress like Bozo or Ronald McDonald? I see him more like Krusty the Clown. Look at him smiling.

Maybe Joey is smiling because he is thinking of what fun he could have in prison? His lawyer says he was really a nothing kind of guy, just another bum in the mob.

Add to the mix Frank Calabrese, Sr. part of the mob scum the cops are trying to put down. Nicholas Calabrese too. Some guy named James Marcello. There are others, each as worthless as the previous.

Casino (Widescreen 10th Anniversary Edition)

More Mob/Mafia movies (Godfather, etc.)

There's something about the Mob that reminds me of Al-Qaeda. Reckless, yet strategically violent, always in the wrong, yet fascinating in the news. Both are infections that need to be eliminated.

* Two more plead out ahead of mob case
Former cop recalls Chicago mob heyday
A new Chicago mob story is about to begin

Friday, June 15, 2007

Billy Graham, Ruth Graham, Iced Coffee, Hot Days in the Loop

Blistering heat continues to make sitting on a milk crate in the Loop a chore. Mornings aren't so bad, but it gets worse with each hour. Coffee's not so much anymore, and that iced coffee thing is for the birds.

Iced tea, on the other hand, hits the spot. Can't drink it all day, though. Got a cooler I drag with with me, one of those things with a long handle and wheels. Where were those years ago? You'd think that would have been an easy invention. Nope. Took til when, 10 years ago? I'm glad to have it. Old bones drag new things slowly.

The News
Ruth Graham, wife of beloved evangelist Billy Graham, has died. Chicago, at first look, might be seen as a Catholic town, but millions of Protestants live here, and, the fact is, Graham has never been anti-Catholic. Rather, he spoke about Jesus Christ as someone's 'savior' which is, from what I get, basically the same thing a Catholic says. Anyway, she's dead. Somewhat the same as a first lady, but, unlike presidential first ladies, she was always in office.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Cicadas Are Not Roaches, But Still Not Appetizing (for me)

Is there a correlation between cicadas chirping and the intensity of heat? Sitting in a diner off west Washington today, I could hear them buzzing faster than a dental drill.

Speaking of diners - saw a roach in one. Might've been a cicada. Either way, none for me, thanks.

Papers have been selling hot. Cubs playing better, NBA Finals, and better morning weather all are adding up. Slower sales in the heat if the afternoon, though.

The News
Sadly, Woman and Three Children Found Dead Near Chicago. It looks like her husband did it. I don't know. They are from Oswego, but they found the bodies in Channahon.

Cubbies won today.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Cicadas, Conrad Black, Thug Cops, Ravinia

Cicadas are in full bloom. Heard them on my way to Ravinia in Highland Park to hear Dr. John sing. He opened for some mediocre jazz singer. No cicadas in the Ravinia Festival Park, I'm glad to say, but their carcassed shells were everywhere. Kids were checking out exoskeletons right and left, like Christmas ornaments on a maple tree trunk.

Windows closed, AC on, radio on, talking with someone in the car, noisy expressway -- and yet, cicadas.

Some kid in Downer's Grove found a blue-eyed cicada.

Not so many in Loop, though one guy was sporting one of these tobacco-spit colored insects on his suit as he came up out of his apartment building. I didn't ask. The thing doesn't sting, so I let him be. The guy gave me a buck for a Chicago Sun-Times, left me with the change. Why ruin a good thing?

On south 294, there was a billboard showing a kid with a finger up his nose, advertising Grossinger Chevrolet.


As it seems, Grossinger sees itself as mucus that requires a child to pick it. Give the kid a Kleenex and shop at CarMax. Then fire the idiots who designed the billboard.

The News
  • They are filming the next Batman here. Christian Bale is complaining about the rubber muscle suit. Humid in Chicago, Mr. Bale?
  • More thug cops beating up on ordinary people. This week's low life did it on camera at a bar pool table. There's plenty of good guy cops, but the rash of morons who are cops stomping on the little clearly need a visit from Dr. Phil, or better yet, Dr. Kevorkian. Dr. Phil has a conscience; we need Dr. Kevorkian instead to do what he does best.
  • Conrad Black's trial looks to be closing up. I wonder if he will get the Paris Hilton treatment.

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