Diary of a Newspaper Hawk

NIKE and the Cleveland Plain Dealer took out an ad in their newspaper. You can read the text below, but you know what, Michael Jordan got it done. I like the ad, but we had the 90s Bulls. We just did it. Imagine if Lebron came home to Cleveland. Imagine if the team struggled early but finished the regular season strong. Imagine if their big man went down, but they still found a way to power through the Eastern Conference. Imagine if they faced the top seed in the Finals. Imagine if they pushed Game 1 to overtime but lost another star to injury. Imagine if everyone counted them out. Imagine if they shocked the world and took the next two games. Imagine if fatigue caught up with them, and they lost Games 4 and 5. Imagine if they defied odds, logic and the basketball gods to come back and win the series in 7. Except this isn't Hollywood. It's Cleveland. Nothing is given. Everything is earned. Just do it.

This University of Chicago website shows us what evolution has come to. UChicagoHookups.com Plain and simple: students who don't mind having sex with other students they don't know hook up here. Previously, this was a CraigsList.org kind of thing. Or hookers on some tawdry corner. Or a bar floosy and disease riddled man swapping fluids. Or a frat party (or a sorority party). I wonder if Planned Parenthood is co-owner, or provides "see you soon" coupons. An article in the Chicago Tribune here: http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/ct-talk-huppke-hookup-20110321,0,7363178.story Time for baseball season, don't you think?

Christmas is, if nothing else, a time when people are culturally forced to be nice to each other. While this guy is a little crude about it, he gets it. Even the most bitter, angry, hateful people slow down a little. They might not see the full reality of Christmas, but halfway there is a start. Me, I have, as most of you have, plans to have dinner with family. No work today, or tomorrow, but back Monday hawking and slinging everything I've got. To the mystery visitor to this blog who donated to my cause, thank you. May God bless you, too. I hate fig pudding. It sounds awful. Getting a good hot bowl of a thick hearty soup is one way to watch out for the cold mornings. So Merry Christmas. Be thankful, be warm, and don't get too cynical out there. It is Jesus Christ's birthday. Don't ruin it for Him. The News Ronny Santo died . Sad. Always liked him. So did Madoff's kid . Can't say nothing nice about a guy I never knew. Santa has been declared a fatt...

Yesterday in the Loop blew my mind. 49 years ago, I was too young to get it. But as I sat slugging papers, a man comes up to me, maybe 70 years old, and tells me he wants a copy of every newspaper. Old school Italian guy named Alfredo. He gave it all to me the way my dad would have explained it. This was at 6:00 am. "What are you doing here now?" I asked. "I want a good spot. Gonna be a crowd today, and I don't have 49 years in me for the next one." "Right here's a good spot," I said. He pulled out his folded chair, and I sat on me, and we talked until we had to stand and cheer. It beats hearing about Blagojevich and those whiners who are all in a tizzy about Sarah Palin's boobs. If I want conversation about nothing, I can just hook into whatever Miley Cyrus or Justin Bieber is talking about. Congratulations Chicago Blackhawks. Search Amazon.com for Blackhawks Gear

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone? Not much here in Chicago whether's she's here or not. Warmer temps don't mean sun. They mean slush.   Stories about the dark side of Chicago continue. Terrorism suspects . Cops who tortue suspects . Corrupt lawyers going to prison . How much the Chicago Bears suck .   And this isn't getting into our corrupt politics. President Obama, Illinois' holy child, hasn't done squat for Chicago. We are not better of than we were in 2008 under George Bush. Unemployment is worse, state and city politics is as bad as when Blago tried to sell Obama's seat. So Mr. Yes We Can is just Mr. I Hope We Will.  

You heard the news. The Chicago Tribune (whose papers I love to sell) sold the Cubbies. It happens. Trib wasn't doing it right, plus they aren't selling enough papers, let me tell you. Do I care? No. Who owns the Cubs? The fans do. Not Tommy Rickert. Don't get me wrong. He pays the bills, and will make some money. No one believes him when he said they would go to the World Series. That's bar talk. Still, he is planning to improve the food and johns. That's a good thing. So welcome, Tom Rickert. Get it done right.

Been looking around. What do I see? Crabby people who don't know how good they've got it. So what, the Cubbies are being sold? You think they'd be sold if they were making tons of money? No way. Why aren't they making tons? Because the present management can't get the job done. The White Sox take it all the way. What do Cubs fans do? Whine about a guy named Bartman who had a ball land in his lap. Bears fans are no better. They gripe about QBs. It could be worse. We could've had Brett Favre. Instead, all they got on their lips are two words: Nineteen. Eightyfive. What's that? Right. 24 years ago. It ain't just sports. Politics too. Whoa is me, whoa is the nation, whoa is the world. I call talk show lemmings. The Pied Piper of the Air Waves gets on, complains about the president. This year, they hate Obama. Last year, it was Bush. Their supporters can't hear any wrong, and their detractors can't hear anything good. Both blame the media, but it is t...

A few known facts are buzzing around. Sarah Palin's publishing a book, and while it won't come out until 2010, people are talking about it . My Chicago Bears are looking at a sweet schedule for the fall. It is politics as usual in the Supreme Justice election as Obama nominates a Democrat. This should play well in Chitown, land of Daley, Jackson and Blagovich . Poor Mike Tyson's daughter Exodus is seriously hurt . Chicago has a Swine Flu death . Susan Boyle is still amazing (but can she sing the blues?). Cubs are playing average, Sox are not. Both aren't impressive. If I cared about hockey, I'd watch the Blackhawks . Nice season they are racking up.

With all the noise about Drew Peterson , Rod Blagovich and the Barack Obama gaff , it is fun to see something cool. Lebron James Game Winning Shot Live NBA Playoffs 2009 Game 2 Cleveland Cavaliers vs Orlando Magic. Michael Jordan look out. The Chicago Bulls are still my boys, but I gotta give props to King James.

Say it ain't so. Chicago's favorite team, the Chicago Cubs may soon be the Chicago Zellies, playing in the what --? It better not be Trump Field. Whatchu' Talkin' 'Bout, Willis? Sears Tower Gets New Name (and more here ) Here's to Ronnie Woo Woo , a man who is a fan. We've never met, but as spring approaches, I must think of him. Mr. Ronnie Wickers, I hope all is well tonight. I am a fan of your fandome.

Curious people, mostly wondering what the new tabloid look of the Trib is like, rushed to buy in the last few weeks. Warmer weather helped. If you don't count yesterday, that is. Rain soaked my stock. Most of it, anyway. The rain came down so hard, I couldn't keep my plastic on. That's not the real news though. News Sadness today. You saw the headline. Red and Norm died. Cancer for Red. Norm - they don't know yest, but 'natural causes'. Chicagoans know who I mean. Red was the guy in booth, and Norm was more of an analyst after the game. They loved basketball, and helped guys like me who never had the skills love it more. They both played it, (Red even coached it), and both were fans through to the end. These guys were the Harry Caray of their game. I got get to my corner, but this is big for us. To you, Norman Allen Van Lier III, and to you, John G. “Red” Kerr, rest in peace. It is a different ballgame now.

Fighting a cold and selling papers on a cold day are a difficult mix. Sometimes, there isn't enough coffee to warm what is cold. Chicago Tribune no more? With Sam Zell's leadership apparently a failure, and internet news competing with local papers, the Chicago Tribune is considering bankruptcy. What's is a world without the Trib? Fewer sales for me. End of tradition. Death of an era. I'm no hockey fan, but even I am impressed with the headline " Chicago Blackhawks rout Phoenix Coyotes 7-1 ." There's a labor sit-in . I haven't followed this one, but if workers are getting screwed over, I say skip sitting in at the factory. Instead, go to the guy who is making the decision and sit quietly outside of his house. Chicago's Police Department continues to lament the PR impact of idiot ex-officers like Anthony Abbate. He's the huge guy that beat up a little 115 pound female bartender. Although Abbate is a clear disgrace to male honor as well as the i...

The rains soaked every ounce of this city, most of which landed in my bones. Ain't coffee that I need, but more rest. Papers won't sell themselves tomorrow. But, I'm sick, bedridden, barely focused enough to use my laptop. The news has been a wild lot lately. With John McCain's campaign surging, with a woman helping him lead, I cannot help but think Barack Obama might be worried. It looks like he hasn't got this campaign and the media as wrapped up in bed like it looks. Of course, we need Obama out of Illinois if we want a real man (or woman) in the Senate again. Old Obama has been chasing the White House so much he forgot he has a day job as a senator. I mean, who does he think he is, Carol Moseley Braun? That's true incompetence . Carlos Zambrano threw a no hitter for the Cubbies. Chicago had a half marathon yesterday, as wet as the rest of the city. This was the 2008 Banco Popular Chicago Half Marathon. I gotta give a salute to those crazy runners who decid...

I sat in a restaurant watching the Cubs. It occurred to me how often I do this now. It helps the Cubbies are winning, but the places are smoke free now. I'm sinking my cash into joints I'd never go to five years ago. No griping from the tobacco addicts. No one says you can't smoke. Just do it outside. Chicago needs more pollution if we're going to beat Beijing in the Olympics. Smokers, you go ahead, light up until the clouds are dark, and windows are covered with a yellow dinge. We can't do this alone. Of course, we need to get the Olympics first. Daley's on it. And, more importantly, Cubbies are up 5.5 games and the White Sox are clinging to a 0.5 game lead. We'll take it. The News Meanwhile, nepotism is hitting the streets again. Barack Obama mentor Illinois Senate President Emil Jones is trying to get his kid into politics . Cook County boss John Stroger (now deceased) put his son into office too. There's a new political machine in town, and it looks ...

The news is sad. Although the Olympics started amazingly (Mayor Daley cameos throughout), the morning's joy is squashed by the death of Bernie Mac . He had his ups and down. The Bernie Mac Show was a class act. His support of Barack Obama gave us some low notes. But, he was through and through a Chicago man. White Sox fan to the hilt. Rest in peace, Bernard Jeffrey McCollough. Bernie Mac, I'll miss you.

Big news. Not exactly fresh, but it should be. Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn died. A real man, and real writer, he received the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1970 because of books like One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich , and later wrote The Gulag Archipelago . To the punks who think they know what freedom is, read what not having freedom looks like. The News Two words: World Series. We dream it. Two teams, one city, one series. Let's duke it out. Might be. Could be. But will it be? Hopefully, if Harry Caray is in Heaven (and no one is taking bets on that one), I hope he whispers to God to let it happen. Democrat Arenda Troutman. What Chicago be without a corrupt Democrat in the news? Speaking apparently of herself as well as others (Clients? -- I hope not), she was recorded on tape saying, "Most aldermen, most politicians are hos." The Chicago Sun-Times writes that she guilty , having "admitted to taking bribes and extorting developers seeking zoning preferences....

While politics continues to be run by salary girls and imbeciles, we have two decent baseball teams. I don't mean the Kane County Cougars. Something bright. The News Jerome Holtzman, Dean Of Chicago Baseball Writers, Dies At 82 Not so bright. Sad. He knew the Chicago Cubbies and White Sox as well as could be known. Time to read No Cheering in the Press Box . There's no cheering tonight.

Gas prices aren't that high. Are you a taxi driver? No? Barely making ends meet? No? Then quit yapping about how bad the gas pump is. I get it. Higher than ever. But the gas isn't anything like the hot air people have coming on that life is now hard. What are you paying more a month? $100? Sure, burning through $100 a month is not unimportant, and adds up at year's end, but Henny Penny 's sky didn't fall as fast as yours. The News Rush Limbaugh just signed on for eight more years . What does this mean? All those smug people who hate George W Bush might have John McCain as their next president, or Barack Obama is bound to be a one-term president. Either way, Limbaugh's getting the money because he has lots of listeners. How many? $400 million worth. Chicago White Sox are kicking tail . Cubbies too. Both are 2.5 games into first place. Ol' Hawk was getting some laundry done when the counter maven groused about the success of the Cubs. I told her that any true ...

Tomorrow looks perfect. A high of 70 degrees. Not as many gang twats killing each other last week. Sadly, though, there is much greater tragedy. Myanmar (or Burma for you oldsters) has had its putz leaders making political efforts to deny aid so its generals could look good. Don't tell me Bush screwed up New Orleans. Even moron Mayor Ray Nagin is better than the Myanmar jerks. Finally, though, aid is starting to move. ( US begins aid flights to Myanmar cyclone victims ) China had its massive earthquake, killing 10,000 so far. After they practically ruined the Olympics with their arrogant oppression of Tibet, sympathies might return. ( Earthquake measuring 7.8 Richter scale hits SW China ) This all outshines sunny days. The News Cubs are 18-19 and in third place. White Sox are 20-17 and also in third place. Pick Obama's VP Who should be Barack Obama's Vice President Running Mate? Pick McCain's VP Who should be John McCain's Vice President Running Mate? Plus the ofte...

Is it warmer on Mars today? I checked weather.com, and could not find it listed. Some cool cash was laid down by Mars for Wrigley, though. Not Mars the planet, but Mars the candy bar people. Chicago is for sale, and people are buying. How long before the Chicago River sells the naming rights and becomes the Primerica Filth Stream? My days are hot and cold. If you live in Chicago, my lament is also your reality. Some like it hot. Others like it as cool as a cucumber, which, on a warm day turns into hot relish. Freezing alert tonight. 82 degrees last week. The salary girls just don't know what to wear. They could take a fashion tip from Miley Cyrus and go topless . She's that sort now, but I don't think anyone is surprised. Such too has been the sales of papers. Up and down, but I think people are tired of tawdry politics. Chicago's a Democrat town. You are not allowed to live here unless you are a registered Democratic, and not allow to stay unless you voted at least tw...